I’ve been hurt a lot by friends of all sorts and one day many years ago, I came home from school crying because I didn’t have any friends, because I didn’t find anyone who ‘thinks’ like me. I’m not saying that I was better than anyone else, or more mature, but being the only child, you naturally get more influenced by grown-ups. So when I’m in class, and start talking about the current economic climate or corrupt politicians (because I hear my parents talk about that stuff), other kids naturally run away… My mum told me ‘you are your own best friend’, and my dad told me ‘best friends don’t exist, because they come and go’.
I found that girls are the worst. They get jealous, they gossip behind your back, they want you to look/act a certain way, because somehow their image depends on that, they pretend to be your friend, but you’re actually secret enemies. Of course, that’s a massive stereotype, but I’ve always experienced those sorts of girls in my life.
I thought it would get better when I’m older, since we become more mature, and it does, depending on how you look at it. We all have different priorities, and again, massive stereotype but it’s what I’m currently experiencing: people my age tend to have priorities of being ‘social’, whether it’s having accounts of every single social media company that ever existed or going to parties, getting drunk, etc.
I’m not interested in that, because my soul is not going to benefit from that, but someone else might. I’m not saying I’m ‘right’ or ‘better’, but I’m saying that we’re all taking different paths. And hopefully, we’ll reach the same destination of self-discovery, and self-improvement, even if our methods or ways of living is completely different.
So, what is a real friend?
I define it as someone who uplifts you for no advantage or gain of their own. They do it because they simply love you, respect you, and trust you, which are three highly important things in any friendship or relationship.
But when it comes to friends, it’s totally quality rather than quantity. I feel like just one real, genuine friend, who truly loves you is equal to a million friends, and you would be very lucky to find a friend like that, so smile if you do (and smile if you don’t!)
At the end of the day, you have to learn to become your own best friend, as cheesy as it sounds. You will always have yourself, you sleep with yourself, you wake up with yourself, eat with yourself, and you’re inside yourself. So, make the most out of you, and make sure to have alone time, when you can just talk to yourself and self-reflect, it’s golden time. Funnily enough, the more you bond/connect with yourself, the more easier it will become to bond/connect with other people, since you’re more familiar with your needs and priorities in a friend. And when you can provide for yourself, you can definitely provide for others.