This post is a little randomly put together and I don’t know if it makes sense or not, but feelings/thoughts don’t have to make sense…
When the closest people to me hurt me or upset me, I sometimes tell myself, “why do people have to be like that?!”. It’s because you see them as your place of comfort in the world, and that often happens with my parents, since I know that I come from them and I trust them so much and when they hurt me, it can be extra painful. I end up picturing humankind to be the same, because if they are like that, then what would strangers be like? It’s just generalising humans. You can’t forget that you are your own place of comfort – because when there’s love inside you, that’s what you’ll see in humans, and the world around you. When there’s fear inside you, that’s what you’ll see in humans and the world around you.
People who are close to you can easily manipulate your emotions because you are so psychologically opened up to them by choice. Happiness is a choice at every moment, it’s self-controlled, and because you choose to be opened up to these people, they can so easily make you feel happy.
If a stranger told you “you’re the best thing that’s ever happened in my life”, you’re most likely not to care, because you’re not close to that person, you don’t love that person, so you’re not receiving what they say because you’re not opened up to them, there’s a mental block. Whereas, if someone close to you said that, it will obviously have an impact on the way you feel, it it reaches your heart so easily.
It’s the same concept when you see a picture of your favourite animal looking happy, it can bring a smile to your face effortlessly and make you happy because you love that animal. As easy as just looking at a picture, you automatically feel happy.
When I open up to people because I love them, I experience all realms of emotions with them, positive and negative. When I experience that with them, it inevitably makes our bond stronger, it makes me discover emotions I didn’t know I could have because I’m so opened up to them. When these people hurt me, it almost shocks me because of that contrast between the good moments, that make up the greatest moments of my life, and the not-so-good moments. It’s like when you have something and it’s taken away from you, that’s worse than when you don’t have it at all. One day, that person can make you feel like you’re not grounded on Earth any more, instead of gravity carrying you, they are. Another day, they can make you cry so much, to the point where you can’t breathe.
Whatever they make me feel, I don’t label as ‘good’ or ‘bad’. I love and enjoy our good moments, and dislike feeling hurt because of them, but that’s not necessarily a ‘bad’ thing. As I posted before, I don’t label my emotions like that because they all help to complement each other, and I’m grateful for what I feel and experience because it opens up my mind and heart more.
I wish the world didn’t have any labels. If there were no countries, we would just call our world ‘Earth’, we would just call all living things ‘creatures’, so we’re all equal. We wouldn’t place names we can’t pronounce on people with health issues, because they’re just fine. We would stop judging people based on appearance and start discovering each other. We would view the killing of anyone to be unjust, not based on where they live. But the world wouldn’t work without labels because humans like to give labels to everything, in order to feel more secure. Humans work on a basis of ‘good’ and ‘bad’, ‘beautiful’ and ‘ugly’, ‘right’ and ‘wrong’, hence one of the first things you psychologically do when watching a movie is give these labels to the characters. But how are we as humans understanding each other if we all label things differently?
Labels may be a way to be more ‘civilised’ (another label), to put rules in society in order for us to live ‘correctly’ (not do ‘bad’ things). The government has the label of ‘power’ because without it, we’d be so barbaric. But guess what? We already are barbaric. I feel that ‘society’ is built upon image – people with black suits and glasses who look smart, it’s nothing. If we lived in a lost world with no labels, in my opinion, it would be a much better place, rather than to live in a civilised world that isn’t civilised in any way. A world where smartness is labelled upon the person with a PHD or someone who can use big, complicated words is superficial. A world where innovation means manufacturing new weapons that can kill more people with as little effort as possible is wrong. A world that does have money but chooses to spend it on being so technologically advanced rather than to feed its own people and then complain of an ‘economic breakdown’ is barbaric. A world where people are so ignorant of each other, they create barriers between each other due to race, religion, sex, gender, age, colour, whatever is not civilised.
But I was wrong, I used ‘world’ in every sentence above and it’s not the world, it’s individual people. In fact, it’s not the individual people but it’s their individual choices because we’re all born innocent. I sometimes seem ‘anti-human’, but I know the world is full of beautiful souls (sounds cheesy, but true) and I love them. I just want to see more unity, warmth, understanding, care, tolerance and above all, love because every one of us has the energy to do that. It’s those little things you do when you go out and help someone who’s lost, give up your seat for someone, give charity (not to ‘overcome world poverty’, but to be the cause of someone smiling), and to greet people with pretty smiles.