It scares me when I’m at school and I look around me to see every individual looking into their phones, numb to their surroundings. It really scares me. The moment I zone out and observe, literally every single one staring at their phone screens, not interacting with one another. When I’m on the bus and zone out, every person around me has ear phones in their ear. Everyone looks the same, everyone does the same thing. And I think that each and every one of those people have accounts online, adding to the massive database, containing their private information and life. Every single person’s life is added to that database that’s owned by who? I don’t know. That scares me. So artificial and unnatural.

Super Healthy Plant Protein Pancakes

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This is a super healthy, energising, protein filled recipe and I love eating it for breakfast! It does not look very appetising but it is very delicious! Especially if you’re craving something sweet, at the same time, want something nutrious and filling, this is perfect!

  • 1-2 bananas (I usually use 2!)
  • 1 scoop of hemp protein powder (provides around 14g of protein, all the essential amino acids, fibre, and lots of omega 3 and 6!)
  • 2 eggs (around 12g of protein and high in vitamins A, E, K, B, and folic acid)
  • Around 1 tbsp of honey (or less/more depending on your taste buds! You can substitute honey for any liquid sweetener that you would like)
  • Oats (I usually add enough so the batter is at a thicker consistency, but this also adds good complex carbohydrates as well as more protein!) I usually like to add 95g to have more calories and carbohydrates.
  • Coconut oil to fry

Start off with mashing the bananas well with a fork and add the eggs. Mix well but be careful not to mix too harshly as this can breakdown some of the nutrients in the eggs. Next, mix in the hemp protein powder, and the honey. Then gradually add in the oats so the batter reaches a thicker consistency so it sticks together while frying. Pour a bit of the pancake mixture in a hot, oiled pan (but be careful because this pancake can burn quickly!) and flip it to the other side when it is golden brown. Serve with anything that you like or you can eat it plain as this pancake is a filling, nutritious meal! Enjoy ♥♥

 

Openness…

Am I the only person who thinks its not weird to go up to a random person and say ‘hi, I’m going through this and that in my life’? If that was the case, the other person may think you’re weird, you’re random, or they need to get away from you because that’s just not ‘normal’. It’s okay to ask someone for the time, directions, but it’s not normal to go up to someone and say ‘hey.. Have you ever felt like this?’. It’s like a taboo subject. I get surprised whenever people tell me ‘you must really trust me to say this to me’ or ‘Lugine you don’t share things like that with people’, it’s not normal. I feel estranged because I don’t own my experiences, but they’re there to be  shared and be opened about. Because inside of us we are all going through the same thing. We’re all vulnerable. We all need to open up with each other, hug each other, and share. There is some kind of distance between me and the words that I say. When I say something, I’m not ‘saying something so personal to myself’ even though people view it as personal, but I see a distance between the words I say and the very me. I sometimes have this openedness that some people oppose, people think I’m weird. By time I learnt so ‘socialise’ myself in what to say and share with people. But I actually don’t like that. I want to walk with no weight upon myself, I want to walk like an opened heart, feeling and sharing everything. Walking emotionally bare. There is no taboo subject to me, there is nothing that you can say to me that’s ‘weird’ because I know that it’s inside us all.

I guess that’s why people always approach me for things, for help, random people on the street talk to me, pick me to talk to, rather than anybody else due to emitting that openedness because people feel it. People feel that you’re opened to them. Why do people generally find it hard to be emotional or to cry in public? To be opened to the world? To not feel awkward to show their very emotion? Why do some people feel uncomfortable when conversations get too deep, too emotional and hard to grasp? Why are people walking like a rigid, rational, machine rather than a flowy, soft, opened to feel human being? I wish the world was like that.. That anyone can just walk up to anyone and say ‘I’m going through this’ and they both hug each other and other says ‘I’m going through this too’. Love.

My experience with waist training.

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My experience with waist training after one month… 

I’ve always wanted a waist trainer, but I was somehow hesitant to if it actually works, is it safe, and what’s the point if I can just workout to get the shape I want?  So far, I have lost 1.5″ off my waist, down to 23.5″ and I’m actually quite surprised because I didn’t think it would be that effective on me. After just one to two weeks of wearing it I’ve noticed that it helps to flatten my stomach and enhance my shape more. Also, my favourite feature about the waist trainer is that it significantly improved my posture and it’s more second-nature to me to have a better posture even if I’m not wearing it. I never wanted to get a waist trainer as a weight loss medium, in fact, I’m actually trying to gain weight, but I wanted it to improve my body shape more, and attain a smaller waist, which is what I prefer on myself, (I’m not trying to portray that this is the ideal body type in any way, I’m just expressing what I prefer on myself and sharing my experience with my readers!). Continue reading

Marula Oil!

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Marula oil is by far my favourite skin care essential (along with rosewater!), it is a naturally anti-ageing, anti-oxidant rich oil, that’s reportedly the more powerful version of Morrocan argan oil. Through using it, I found that my skin looks so much more radiant, and youthful, especially when I apply it at night, in the morning my skin seriously looks magically amazing! This oil is so light weight, it absorbs fast into my skin, and even gives a matte finish to the skin (it can even be used as a make-up primer). It is a little bit pricey, but I think it’s totally worth it, since it’s completely natural, not artificial, and works absolutely amazing for the skin…

More information about marula oil:

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What to do with damaged hair?!

 

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You need to do two things – replenish protein levels and deeply condition. Replenishing protein levels in your hair is vital since this is what your hair is made from and all the damaged done to it by heat, chemicals, and everyday wear and tear can strip your hair from its optimum protein levels, and therefore leaving it weak, lifeless, and not in it’s natural state. Deep conditioning is also highly important so you supply your hair with enough moisture to keep it smooth, and sustain it’s elasticity.

Hair Masks

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I find myself lost. I don’t know who I am. What I stand for. Just lost in emotions. Where am I? I find myself being 12 again. The age of 12 when I faced so many major changes in my life, confused about my identity, asking who am I, where am I, why am I created. A time of complete confusion. A time where I felt lonely, a time where I felt like I needed so much, I needed freedom. Physical and spiritual freedom. I had no confidence. Constrained within myself. I didn’t feel beautiful. Nothing made me feel beautiful. I used to wish someone told me I was truly beautiful. I used to wish a boy could hold me, touch me, just out of pure love and emotion. I used to wish someone can look into my eyes and uplift me, lift me up so so high that I wouldn’t feel a thing. My face showed absolutely no sign of what I was suffering from inside. I wanted to be held, I wanted to feel safe. I wanted someone to wrap around me, protect me. I was so lonely. Gradually during my teenage years, I developed and became a whole new person, each day, just reflecting and growing, mentally and emotionally. I went to all different directions, tried them, experienced them, and picked where I want to be. I got incredible confidence, from simply reducing myself down to my soul, emitting pure love, a pure smile to everything around me. I got to a point where I felt genuine happiness in my life. And through all I’ve been through, I’ve genuinely realised how purely blessed I am, what I want in life, to live a life full of growth, love, and pure embracing of my emotions, good and bad, because they’re all experiences and they’re a blessing for me. That’s how I continued and I know that’s how I want to continue, just living genuinely with love. But how do I feel right now? I feel like I’m back to 12 or my early teenage years. I feel like I want so much, I want so much love, I want to be wrapped and protected. I feel scared. I don’t feel like I’m beautiful. I created this blog originally to share my emotions, and positivity on body image and self-acceptance. How ironic I find myself 3 years later wanting that self acceptance all over again. It’s not as intense as when I was younger, but I really feel like I’m not good enough.. I’m not beautiful enough.. I’m not complete.. I’m crying as I write this.. I don’t know who I am I don’t know what I want.. I feel confused.. I feel like I am nothing.. I want to cry cry cry all my emotions out.. It’s overwhelming.. But this is just growth…

Why do all women look like each other?!

Madison Stubbington for Gucci, a twist to the typical ‘trendy’ make-up…

Social media, trends, whatever, are all portraying the typical woman with big lashes, chiselled cheekbones, a defined jawline, a thin contoured nose, bronzed, flawless skin, big full lips that this ‘particular’ celebrity induced, etc… Contouring with make-up has been like an order ‘this is how you do it, this is how you should look like’ and there’s nothing wrong with that, if you’re comfortable with yourself looking like that, that’s fine. But it’s about finding what works best for you, not for the mass. I was doing my friend’s make-up the other day and what stood up for me was when she said ‘you didn’t try to change my facial features’. I myself love big lashes, bronzer, but I feel uncomfortable when I follow these trends, why do I want to be like the rest for? I started researching Korean, Japanese, Parisian, African trends, etc. for a possibly different twist on the typical picture in social media. The best advice I would give to anyone is to spend time in front of the mirror, experiment, and be creative with what works best for you. Do more leading than following, find your own style. Study yourself. What ever is on trend, try doing the opposite, try to invert the traditional methods of how things are done. Find out how to contour your own face shape, your own eye shape, through trial and error, pick what makes you feel comfortable in your own eyes. Who says you can’t wear a strong, bright lip with a strong eye?! Same thing for how you dress, your hair, your body, study yourself and be comfortable in yourself, there’s no feature that you have to hide for the eyes of society, and there’s no feature that you have to show. It’s your own identity, not anyone else’s. I was walking by a jewellery store the other day and I was happy to see model Madison Stubbington for Gucci without heavy contouring, eye lashes, big overdrawn lips, not that there’s anything wrong with that, but it’s taking a different direction to the ‘norm’. Smile, you’re a beautiful soul (and spend time with yourself in the mirror)! ♥ ;D

I’m sorry I haven’t been posting as much. This period that I’m in has been slightly unusual for me. I’ve been so far away from my self, so caught up with things that are not myself that I grew distant from the very inner me. I’ve been quiet on my blog simply because I didn’t have anything to share. So lost, so confused, feeling a multitude of things that I couldn’t even begin to express. I had no words to describe the inner muddle that I was in. I was feeling like there was no inspiration within myself, it’s a phase of complete quietness, complete observance, complete submission to the unwanted places that I was in. I wake up every day it’s the same routine, same thing happening in my day on, and on and on… In complete submission to that, it became my comfort zone. It’s almost like I’m scared to do anything outside of it. I’m too comfortable and I know if I’m too comfortable I won’t find inspiration anymore in whatever I’m in. From all the muddle that I was in inside me, I didn’t want anything else inside me. I stopped eating as much, if anyone would give me an order I would get angry because I simply don’t want any type of input to me because I have enough stuff I have to deal with inside me. And when you don’t put anything in the input, what happens? You lose energy, lose inspiration.  It’s time to wake up, shake things up a bit, and learn from what happened to me. Take risks, get out of your comfort zone even if you don’t know where you’re going. As long as you love yourself, prioritise yourself, have trust in yourself, because it will  reflect outward. I need to breathe and focus in myself, tune my focus inside me… What do I really feel? What do I do? Is my body in a good healthy condition? (Because that reflects the mind) I want to live life fully, consciously, healthily. And it’s okay if I had a time where I was living complete opposite to that, it’s all about making the most of your experiences, the darkest ones, and the brightest ones because they all compliment each other. I’m sorry me… I want to say sorry to myself for neglecting myself like that.. I’m sorry.