Too much empathy?

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I’ve been empathising and feeling people so much, to the point where I feel that I’m them and it shocks me to feel what they feel. It scares me. My heart feels like it doesn’t belong to me, because it’s filled with the emotions of others, until I wake myself up, and find me, to relocate myself back to me. It opened up my eyes more to what I really want in my life, and not to do what they did. I do it too much. I feel overwhelmed. I love feeling, because to me, they are my experiences. The more I feel, the more I experience. Therefore, I always try to understand others, and feel what they feel. I love it. But recently, I’ve been doing it too much, to the people who are closest to me, to the extent where I’m physically shaking and feel like I have no energy. I prayed, asking God to fill my heart with his love. I felt much better. I don’t know how much is too much. I don’t know if I should continue or stop myself. I feel like it’s a duty that I have. I empathise with everyone, the ‘good’ and ‘bad’, I guess it’s because I have a natural care for people, or that I’m opened to people. There’s no right way or wrong way to do anything. I believe sharing ideas, emotions, and thoughts is the way to being closer together. It’s common ground, rather than distancing ourselves from each other through the increasing barriers between us, when from inside, we all really are the same.

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Collagen Maca Smoothie…

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This smoothie is protein rich (it contains around 20g of protein, which is about half your recommended daily intake!). It contains collagen, which is beneficial for your skin, providing elasticity and hydration, increases metabolism through improving thyroid function, in addition to strengthening bones and joints, as collagen makes up 90% of bone mass. Another super ingredient in this smoothie is maca, which is an indigenous Peruvian food that helps to boost energy, brain function, and fertility.

12g Hydrolysed Collagen powder

10g Maca powder

1 tbsp Honey

2 Bananas

1 Avocado

A little milk for a thicker smoothie

I added ice cream too!

…Enjoy the yumminess!

My Life Felt like TV…

DSC_0197It just feels so weird when all of a sudden, your life feels like a drama, a movie, a TV series. To the extent where you don’t even know what to feel or what to think any more, because you’ve never experienced such things, you only see them on TV to potentially attract audience. So people watch it and get amused, but when it happens to you, it hits you. You start to think of it like a chess game. What move should I make and what are the consequences of it? To put myself in everybody else’s shoes and think what’s the best decision for all of us. To fully think with the mind of that person. And to think that you have the power to change it all, to turn everything upside down, to experience the tough consequences, but it should all add up to form a bigger picture, in the long term, to something positive and meaningful. But thinking in the short term, makes it dominate your mind and lets nervousness run through you. Feeling vulnerable. Feeling hurt. But feeling powerful, because it’s in my hands. I try to take a mental break from it, but even when I sleep, I’m dreaming it. I don’t know what to do. I decide to wait a bit and see what fate brings, but look at every moment that passes with doubt, wondering if I should have done something.

This is how I felt a while ago, now things are cooler, and not as heated up. And what happened at the end was okay, but I know that it’s not the end. It’s like a roller coaster going up and down, but now I have a better, clearer picture of what to do when it shoots up again.

Hydrating Coconut Berry Smoothie!

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Coconut Water – Which is super hydrating as it contains electrolytes calcium, magnesium, phosphorus, sodium and potassium, it also regulates blood pressure, aids digestion, and helps you to refresh!

3 tbsp Coconut Milk

1 tbsp Coconut Oil

A handful of raspberries

A handful of blueberries

A few strawberries

1 tbsp honey

Be Free!

picSometimes I feel like people don’t actually know how much freedom they lack. They can’t even think with the mind they have, they don’t know how controlled it is by other mediums. They don’t own it. It’s almost like we need to go back to birth and re-learn everything we know, so we are socialised neutrally and look at the world and fellow creatures with a neutral perspective rather than a biased one, full of pre-conceptions, stereotypes, and labels. We like to label things, everything, even emotions, as ‘good’ and ‘bad’, but we need to let go off any labels and experience life first hand. To me, that’s true freedom. To be able to own your own thoughts rather than have them fed to you, subconsciously that you don’t even know it. You don’t know how much ownership you actually have of your mind. It’s time to start realising and to let go off how you are psychologically controlled. Realise how the system of the world feeds you, and owns you to create barriers between one another. Inside we are all made of the same substance, we are all human, and instead of judging others, empathise with them, no matter how different they are because that way you are only being opened to love more. You need to be curious and learn consciously rather than being subconsciously ignorant (not realising your thoughts are being controlled by other means) or being consciously ignorant. That’s why I’m always curious and ask questions about people who live a different life to me, who have different beliefs or faiths or cultures to me, instead of holding onto stereotypes, instead, I try to experience as much as I can. That’s why I want to travel the world so much, to immerse myself with different people.

Back to how we are controlled, even the pure, natural water that we drink has chemicals and contaminants in it, while the food that we eat contains additions that are not needed, increasing the gap between us and nature. Even the fact that your skin care routine involves scrubbing, cleansing, washing, toning and moisturising is fed to you. The fact that we condition our hair after we shampoo is fed to us – apparently you can just use water to wash your hair with no shampoo. The simplest things in our everyday lives are fed to us. The fact that people celebrate New Years, or even birthdays, for example, is fed to us, it’s not necessary. The clothes you currently wear is fed to you by fashion designers. Why can’t guys wear skirts? If a guy walks around in a skirt, people would laugh. Why? Because society painted a picture of how a guy should look like a feed it to you, that’s why you laugh. Even sex is fed to us, instead of it being natural and instinctive, society gives us a picture of ‘this is how you do it’. Porn gives people unrealistic images of how it should be and how our bodies should look like, which contradicts the quality of intimacy and love in real life. Our physical picture and traits are fed to us by society. If a woman is covered head to toe in  black fabric, she is seen as ‘oppressed’ and a woman wearing g-strings is seen as ‘free’, but also may be labelled as a ‘slut’. We are the ones that are oppressed for having these pre-conceptions.

Even religion has lost its true meaning because it’s fed to us by society. Now, it’s about labels. It’s not about the direct relationship between an individual and God any more. If someone has a problem, and I tell them to talk to God, they respond ‘I don’t have a religion, how am I supposed to talk to God?’, that doesn’t make any sense to me, society feeds us that God is a religion, another label. I tell them forget religion, just simply talk to God with a strong intention. Society tells us that you must have a label e.g. religion, or to be a ‘right’ person to talk to God. Wow, can’t we just be us with no labels?

Even the killing of just one person at a certain place in the world is seen by society as more important than the killing of 100 people elsewhere. Human life is human life, why does it matter where in the world it is? The killing of people who come from the ‘civilised’ countries are the ones that matter. Again, the system of the world is working, and it’s the one you listen to.

I learn so much from everyone I meet and I have a friend who challenges the way I think, she doesn’t mean it, but she puts direct stereotypes on me regarding the geographical region I’m from and faith, and I end up feeling like I have no individuality, but also, everyone from my origin has no individuality because they’re all being stereotyped. But when she stereotypes, she doesn’t mean it in a bad way, it’s just the way she’s socialised to think. She’s subconsciously ignorant, and that’s a blunt judgement from me (wait… wasn’t I the one saying ‘don’t judge’?!). Not just her, but a lot of people in the world, including me, follow the system of the world to think in a certain way which is subconsciously ignorant. We need to wake up and realise how we are being controlled and manipulated, and start to own our minds and bodies and experience things first-hand with no pre-conceptions.